Mothers bear the brunt of patriarchal cultures’ angst. Everything is projected onto them. Everything is withheld from them. Abusive or ineffective fathers and uncles and “leaders” are chosen for the boon of loyalty, for their power and their fun times and their resources, called “strong” because they kill instead of cry. Mothers are given the blame and the pain and ill treatment, the restrictive laws, harassment, near impossibility of justice when assaulted, and the poverty and the abandonment. What men get away with and what women are punished for is so unbalanced, so misdirected both consciously and unconsciously, sometimes it’s a wonder any women are surviving at all. We’ll know we’re exiting the patriarchal period when mothers are treated decently, and blame begins to dissipate and diffuse into the vast landscape of responsibility, where it belongs. Until we do, so much is lost.
Margaret Howard, MFA, LCSW
Depth somatics psychotherapist, regenerative gardener, writer, elder, explorer.